Things They Should Never Say
by Hyper Kid
Summary: Like the title says, it's a bunch of things YYH characters should never, ever say... Don't expect them to be serious.


Things YYH Characters Should Never Say:

Well, this started as me watching the anime, the Three Kings Saga, and something just popped into my head when I was watching Yomi and Kurama chatting. I'm not telling you what it is, because it's down there under 'Yomi', so I'll shut up now and let you read.

Disclaimer: Okay, this could be long... HK doesn't own: YYH, Power Puff Girls, Barbie, Tellutubbies, smurfs, Lindsay Lohan, the Magic School Bus, or any of the songs used in this production. I'm flat freakin' broke, so if anyone _wants_ to give me money... thought not. Oh well. HK DOES, however, own the word 'purplimpilicious' (purple-pimp-i-licious), along with her buddy Maddie. ENJOY!

Warnings: OOC, randomness, preps may be offended... but I don't care about them, so it's all good.

Hiei: Go Bubbles, Go!  
Power Puff Girls rule!(singing)  
I'm a Barbie girl...  
I love you, Kuwabara.  
I'M A TELLYTUBBY!  
The real reason I joined up with Kurama, is because of Youko. He's so cute in his foxy form, you just want to pet him!  
I'm not gay or anything, but I love what you've done with your hair.

Kurama: Duh...  
Okay, you know what, screw the plants! What kind of sissy fights with freakin' flowers?!  
What's two plus two again?  
Oh, screw this guy, his hair is just not cool enough.  
You know, I'm not really afraid of Hiei... he's really cute in his little imp costume... if you put him in blue and white, he could be a smurf!  
Will there be a test afterwards, or can I go to sleep.

Yusuke: Keiko, you're a slut.  
It's not fair! Why does Kurama get the pink clothes?!  
Koenma, I'm sorry I'm always so insolent. I'll be your devoted slave from now on. (servant maid costume)  
Oh you know what, screw the humans. I'm siding with the demons now, because they're hotter!  
Give up Keiko, you'll never be as cute as Kurama.

Kuwabara: Screw honor!  
That bitch needs punching!  
And the square root of pie to the exponent 13 multiplied by 52 divided by 3...  
All my friends are dicks.  
Tellytubbies will rule the world!

Yomi: I'm all ears.  
You know what I just realised? Power sucks.  
And nobody knows that when I talk sounding all calm and smart, I'm really thinking about Lindsay Lohan... in a string bikini... yeah...

Koenma: KINKY RABID BUNNY SEX!!!  
I love stamping!  
(singing) I want a hippopotamus for Christmas...  
George, you really are the most valued member of my staff... come on, group hug.

Kaito: Shuuichi, you suck.  
Oh, fuck this, school is for NERDS!!!  
I wanna ride on the Magic School Bus...  
(singing) This is why I'm hot...  
C'mere Kurama, and give me a hug!

Touya: (singing) I'm. Too sexy for my shirt...  
Kurama, you're a sulky little bitch.  
(singing again) Feliz Navidad! Feliz Navidad!  
Yo, all my homies!

Jin: It's too windy out here!  
But you can't do that Touya! It's against the rules to walk on the grass!  
I hate violence.  
I'm gonna be a chartered accountant when I grow up!

Suzuka: Let's face it, I'm UGLY!!!  
Shishi, you're a whore.  
Genkai's prettier than me.  
SKANKY!  
Purplimpilicious! (same as above)

Shishi Wakamaru: Oh, who cares about fame, I just want to lead a quiet life.  
I'M SEXY!!!  
You know, I really should be in a boy band.  
But I can't fight! What if I break a nail!

Mukuro: (singing [hey, it's FUNNY) I'm a cucumber, I'm a cucumber, I'm a cucumber, I'm a cucumber, I'm a cucumber, I'm a cucumber, so please don't send me to the pickle farm!  
Hiei, I hate you.  
But boys should do the fighting...  
I want my mommy.

Shachi (Yomi's old number two, not sure on the name): Kurama, I love you.  
Who cares about strength?  
Mommy, the big mean Youko beated me up again! (cries)  
Aw, why can't we just be friends?

Sensui: I love people!  
I'm a little teapot...  
I tried counselling, but my other personalities killed the doctor.  
But I'm allergic to demons!

Toguro (younger): Let's DANCE!!  
Fighting sucks.  
I wanted to be a demon because when I was a little kid my brother abused me.  
(singing) Won't you be my squeeze toy...

Raizen: Feeeeed... meeeee...  
I wanna COOKIE!!  
Y'know what, I'm bored. Hokushin! Dance in circles or something!  
The real reason I don't eat humans anymore is the preps. You can get heartburn, or food poisoning from them, I swear.

Karasu: KURAMA, YOU'RE SKANKYLICIOUS!  
Heehee, I'm so HYPER!  
I know I said Kurama was my favourite on Team Urameshi, but I lied. Kuwabara is like, sooo cute!  
(singing) He's my best friend, best of all best friends...  
The Toguros are so cool!

Well, that's it. I could go on forever, but this is what you're getting. I tried to stick with the more OOC ones, instead of completely random stuff that would be hilarious if any of the charas did it, but some of them snuck in there. For example, 'SKANKY'. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! R&R, if anyone has any suggestions, I may also be doing a fic called 'Awkward Situations' which is basically a bunch of 'what if's. Like I said, suggestions welcome, press the pretty purple button now, because, let's face it, purple is an awesome colour.


End file.
